Monday, August 23, 2010

"But real weakness is as rare as real strength"

2009-10-02 (Babies for Sale)

This was a hard show to face. The first twenty minutes are me dropping one ball after another. One turntable was set to 45 so I played a few records at the wrong speed. During that time I also turned a turntable off as it was playing on air. The sound board doesn't turn the turntables off (it'll turn it on, though!). So when you're going from one song to the next you have to make sure you either bring the volume knob connected to that specific turntable all the way down before the next song on the record plays (as we have 3 in the studio) or hit the off button for that volume knob altogether and then fade in the next record with its corresponding volume knob. So it's pretty common to see turntables spinning but not playing anything on air. You just get up and turn it off yourself and cue up the next record. Obviously that wasn't the case for this record.

It all started when delight and I got to the station and the DJs before us told us an EAS test was scheduled during out time slot. We'd been given an overview of how to run one at the live training session a few weeks prior. Of course we just nod our heads and say yeah and expect it to never happen. Then it does and we're scrambling trying to remember how to run it correctly. So now we're going back and forth looking through manuals posted on the walls in different rooms. We're making sure that none of the buttons we're pushing is turning the whole station off and that we're logging it properly. It was recommended that we do it during a long song to try and hide that annoying buzzer sound it gives off so I rearranged the set and put the Jazz tracks up first. It always breaks my heart a little when I have to rearrange the set list for the night as I usually spend a great deal of time thinking about the oder of the songs.

So all this is going on as I'm also trying to make sure records are still spinning and I'm entering what's just been played onto the website playlist. There's also something hectic about the first 15 minutes of every show. Even now I still feel a little rushed to get to from task to task at the beginning. So this night's was a Halloween night's worth of sugar rush. It wasn't until Mingus was on that I could sit and listen to what was being played and it was off. It was just a tad high and the rhythm wasn't right. I looked over at the turntable and I saw the light flashing for 45. My face dropped. I'd been playing records at the wrong speed.

That ate at me. I couldn't stop thinking about how awkward the music must have sounded. I was no longer listening to anything that was being played. I wasn't paying attention to cuing records. So we play some more songs and I'm still out of it and in that daze I turn one off as it's playing on air. Throw a few more bricks on my chest these aren't heavy enough.

Back when I first started DJing at KDVS I used to listen to every show the next day and see how the mixing was and how we could improve on back rapping songs and talking on air in general. This one for whatever reason I don't remember listening to at all. So listening to it for the first time was a bit of a shock. I listened to that first 20 minutes over and over. I beat myself up for it. Why did I make those mistakes?

Soon it led to me seeing that this was a common occurrence in my life. I'm too rigid. I like to plan every little step but my plans have no room for error. That means when something does go wrong I'm thrown for a loop and I panic and it all goes bad. I'm horrible at improvising.

Finally, I gave in. After giving it a day of real thought the common theme is pressure. I put too much of it on myself. Especially on things that are no longer in my control. I'd already made the mistakes. Then I kept thinking about them and ended up making more. And I spiraled.

The reality is that it's not that big of a deal. I just play music. There's no need to get bent. Especially when it comes to music. Music is fluid and harmonious. I should be music. Ironically, if I just played music the show goes off without a hitch.

Just see the other hour and a half.


2009-10-02 (Babies for Sale)



Tracklisting:

3 Grant Green Django Idle Moments


10 Lee Morgan The Stroker The Procrastinator


6 Azymuth Broken Key Tight Rope Walker


-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
3 Charles Mingus Group Dancers The Black Saint And The Sinner Lady


1 Art Blakey & The Jazz Messangers Backstage Sally Buhaina's Delight


3 The Ornette Coleman Quartet T & T Ornette


1 Pharoah Sanders High Life Wisdom Through Music


-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
1 Blank Blue Sonic What?! White
*new arrival
3 Kofy Brown My Own Time Soul Rock
*new arrival
5 Jill Scott He Loves Me He Loves Me (Lyzel In E Flat)
*new arrival
2 Nino Moschella Sleep Boomshadow
*new arrival
-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
6 Sharon Jones 100 Days 100 Nights 100 Days 100 Nights


2 Maya Azucena Right Away Maya Who?!


13 Breakstra Joyful Noise Dusk Till Dawn
*new arrival
3 Wee Put It In Real Good You Can Fly My Aeroplane
*new arrival
-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
9 Clutchy Hopkins Gourds of the Desert Music Is My Medicine
*new arrival
9 Stacey Epps Who Knows The Awakening


3 PPP Pigeon Hole White
*new arrival
3 K-os Call Me Exit


-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
1 Gift of Gab The Ride of Your Life 4th Dimensional Rocketships Going Up


3 Time Machine Let's Not Be Real Slow Your Roll


9 Lushlife In Soft Focus Casette City
*new arrival
4 Ohmega Watts You Are Now Tuned In ft Adam L The Find


-----------------------------air break-----------------------------
7 J-Live The Listening The Hear After

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